Three double oh.

My very second post ever was about one of my most favorite books. 'Gates of Fire' by Steven Pressfeld, depicting the 300 Spartans that held off the Massive Persian Army in a narrow mountain pass for three days.

I always thought it would make a great movie. And it did. I went and saw 300 with Monty and Duster and it was awesome. I guess it got bad reviews, and I was a little scared to see it but this is one of my favorite stories of all time and I felt they did a good job with it. Except for some perhaps unecessary skin.

Where is the honor? Where has honor gone?

Those men would have rather died than live with dishonor. Fires me up I tell ya.

Unbelievable. It's based on a comic book series that was based on a true event, the story portrayed had a little more mythological fantastical license, but the basic story is the same. I do not know why this particular story strikes such a chord with me...

Go see it.. it's good.

Since everyone else is....

Upon returning from vacation and checking blogs most have mentioned, in some form, their favorite college basketball team and their faring in the Madness. I have similar news. The Division III basketball world is already knee-deep into it's madness, and this year both the women AND men from Washington University are going to the Final Four!
This is awesome because it's the men's first time EVER to go, and it's the women's first time to go since I graduated in 2001. The women started this year 1-3 lost their starting point guard to a knee injury and have finished 29-5 overall in true Bear fashion. They have not been a dominate team, but they have found ways to win, and at this time of the year, I think that is more important. Read about them HERE I give my "Yeah Bears" salute. I'll be listening in "washed-up has-been" style this Friday at 6pm eastern on my computer if anyone is looking for me. I've been gone awhile and you all may have forgotten that I exist. I still live in the same house, I have just returned from a much-needed, very restful 10-day vacation. Ski and surf. I did nothing but eat, it seemed, so I have gained about 15 pounds which I look forward to sheding with the advent of spring and the resuming of competitive sports. I still love my long lost friends who I look forward to seeing with the termination of my sentence in Indiana-ville. (ONE MORE WEEK!!!) I still have a boyfriend whose parents I was visiting out in LA for a few days. He still lives here and will be back in a week as well. I have now officially had an IN-n-OUT burger, and have seen a sunset in La Jolla, got a massage in CO, did some skiing, saw some dear friends and took a spin through the Denver Art museum, ate lunch on a roof across from Coors field, and was then subsequently attacked with a debilitating case of the sniffles. I finally gave up and just jammed a tissue up my schnoz and left it there for the duration of the flight. Hey? I ask you, what is more embarrasing: that, or having your nose spontaneously and uncontrollably drip liquid on the magazine your seat mate is reading? Yeah...snot-wick it is. I hope you missed me, I missed you.
I lead a charmed life. Time to start a new season of it. I don't know what it will bring. I have no guarantees. I have a potential new project at work in the works.. (a LOCAL one!) and other than that... I do not know what lies ahead for me. The future is a blackened chicken sandwich... no.. er.. I mean a blackened hole of unknown-ness. I feel rested but scared, and hopeful yet terrified, and answers seem obvious yet impossible to carry out. I went to the retreat...I know God only sees the good, yet I feel he must be disappointed in me, in my selfishness. In spending an absurd amount of money on vacations and massages and movies, yet I didn't miss the little glimpses he left for me: the exit row seat on EVERY leg of every flight (even when I had a "B" boarding pass, the arrival of jane lee's delicious Christmas mix just before I am ready to get into the car for hopefully one last drive to Indiana...

I saw Him in the fact that the condo we stayed in had amongst it's game collection a DELUXE edition of Scrabble, four willing and able participants, and a rocky mountain-ous view that God painted himself...just for me.

I saw Him in the sea lions and their adorable two-by-two waddlings as they sunned themselves on the sand.

I saw Him in the beautiful little four year old I had dinner with. We drew animals on her notepad for two hours.

I saw Him in the vastness of the ocean and in the hospitality of old and new friends.

I saw Him in the embrace of someone who knows me, really knows me, and somehow, someway, loves me still.

I saw Him in the tears.

Takin' a Break..

I am going to be in SoCal visiting for five days and then I'm going to be shooshing down the slopes for a few days in Colorado.

 

I need this...

 

I have been neglecting my blog but when I get back...look out!

 

Exodus 29, (click me...)

Catching Up

Snow fell. It silences and softens a crackly withered landscape. It forces you to be still a little bit. To breathe. To sigh. To smile and shrug your shoulders up a little bit.
Backed into a garage waiting for 21 to arrive. Silently, Prayerfully. Who is this guy?



I'm starting to know. It's terrifyingly exciting and dependable and secure all at the same time.



I'm starting to know less and less about more and more. And it's ok. No one likes a know it all. Like why is it better to sit in public and not hold the hand of the person you are crazy about? Surrounded by sullen married people in a restaurant both saddened and angered me. (no mom, not you and dad.. you two are anything but sullen). What was the point? Choose joy for pete's sake. Choose to be enamored, choose to have some fellowship. Choose to talk about more than dumb gross surface things. Cant we talk about the deep stuff? Why do we avoid community like the plague? Why do we pretend it's all we want when we do not really want it? There things we are carrying with us that we shouldn't carry alone.


There used to be a tirade here..but I decided it's not real.. I'm just looking for a softer place to land. Anyone?


I need to be more forgiving. More understanding. Lord have mercy.


I need to moisturize. Brisk Indiana winds have ripped off my skin cells by the trillion. Leaving a tight crunchy surface that threatens to start a fire on my polyester hotel 'comforter'. Anybody need a blade sharpened? Take my left heel...


I need to not be black headed anymore. My "caRcasian" scalp burned with the second dose of chemicals of the day. Not cool. Blond roots are not cool.



New boots are cool.



Talking to sweet wonderful Angela is cool. I think she was put on this earth so that I wouldn't be alone. To think a thought is to have her understand it, speak truth to it, and not judge it, all in the same turn. She is my dearest. She is my girl crush and I will shout it from the rooftops. I will ride my tooth bike to Indiana talking to her on the phone for the rest of my days. Seems unfair that I don't get more credit for appreciating her in the kingdom of God. You know.. because it's upside down and all. You get more brownie points for learning to like the un-likeable.. but Angie is so stinkin likeable she blows my heavenly handicap! Dirty!

The team got back together this weekend to celebrate one of the most shining examples of humanity that I know. I can't really put adequate words to Alia, how sweet, genuine and just angelically good that she is. She and her unborn baby 'Timalia' and her family were here this past weekend along with some others. It is always good times to reunite and remember one of the best functional groups of people that I have ever been a part of. Out of the blue, T-Raj came to the festivites Friday night with a most interesting and unexpected aura. Bubbly, happy, speaking of 'being in church' which thrills me, and raises a zillion questions that I can't ask.
Alia and I kinda have "mirrored" images of hair... nice part yes? I also forget how tall she it.. I was wearin flats, but she towers over me.. Don't be fooled.

AND Don't you ever count out a basketball team that is under Coach Nancy Fahey. A team which stated out the season 1-3 or something has blossomed into a contender in the UAA, after losing their starting point guard who was last years rookie of the year, and graduating their leading scorer from last year who dropped 23 a game! A team with two healthy seniors on it, a senior playing with a bionic shoulder and the rest, inexperienced sophomores. They went 2-0 this weekend and into sole possesion of first in the UAA. It's the halfway point and the road trips are infront of us, not behind us... so it's still early. But just goes to show you what an amazing program Washington University womens b-ball really is. Ok I may be a LITTLE biased. But this is the first time we've been underdogs. Which is a scary place to put us. Go ahead leave us out of the top 25 ranking for the first time in nine years... see what happens with that. See how that goes for ya. It's hoops time and I'm fired up.

This is Great...

Great weekend all in all. I gotta start off with something that made me laugh in that way that I do when I can't breathe.

I'm sitting on the bleachers watching the Wash U NYU game this past Sunday, all of a sudden, I see this long oblong thing out of the corner of my eye...rolling. Rolling exactly parallel to the court...rolling so fast. Then I see a sandy haired little boy chasing after the object I at first thought it was a cigar or something... The gal I was sitting with then identifies the object and exclaims: "Whoop, runaway hotdog!" Oh that thing was rollin' so fast, I don't know how it got going quite that fast.. but the kid had obviously dropped it. The kid chases it down, before it goes onto the court and scoops it up and slaps it into the bun. "Five Second Rule".

I wish you could have seen this hotdog. Rolled evenly in court dirt. It was awesome. Wash u has the best hotdogs.. they are much like the ones you could get at Busch Stadium.

I don't think this was quite as funny to anyone else.. but I was DYING. It was just rolling so fast... oh the runaway hotdog... I swear I'm sitting here laughing just thinking of it.

One Day More

Wow. What a difference a day makes. Just A day ago, I was not communicating well with my man, fighting with co-workers, feelin groggy, didn't drink a monster ('monster' being the new favorite low-cal low-carb energy bervage that some describe as liquid cocaine) lost two of three in a marathon volleyball match and mistook Phil Woods for my boyfriend on the phone... it was traumatic, don't ask.

Today started off with a Monster! (mmmm mama like...) Ended with all being right with the world again. In the space between, I : A. reconnected with one of my best grade school friends from Texas via the myspace world, B. Was so stinkin proud of my Monty on the radio today talking about how the parents of the Hornbeck boy are nuts for putting that kid on Oprah so soon after the trauma. C. Went to ON TAP and realized I have come a long LONG way in my struggle to see myself as beautiful. D. Received a free stay at the company condo! Woo Hoo. E. Got some fresh advice from a co-worker in the matters of life that matter. F. Got some good work done today. G. Read more Exodus. H. Resurrected my love for chicken parts with the advent of a new poppyseed dressing. Something I 've always loved about processed compressed breaded chicken matter slathered in the gooey sweetness of poppyseed sauce. Love it. It's strange and it's going to kill me on day, but I'll die happy.

I'm sure there were more good things. Many more. It is good when it takes more energy to count ones blessings than it does to count ones pains. Some will point and call me a Pollyanna. I will not care.

I will have joy. Just a smidge... on toast points. You must try one.

"Everybody Loves You?"

And other phrases that inspire neurosis....

"Bless your Heart"
"I very much like your dress, it does wonders for your figure"
"Has anyone ever told you that you remind them of Courtney Love?"

I thought I would have more of these...

Feel free to add your favorite non-complimentary compliment.

Tired

I'm tired of fighting.
I'm not made for it. But you, Lord, massive, mighty Lord, are in control.
I'm not made to pave my own way.. I'm not built for the war for truth. I'm quite certain I'm not even built for this world. I have tried to become that which life has required me to be.
I've tried hard to be the girl that can take care of herself. But time and time again, I fail miserably.
I try to obtain significance.

Jesus.. if only I believed that you are my sole source of significance.

If I could only convince the world that I AM significant because of you. If only they would recognize your blood on me.

If only I found everyone else in my life as significant as YOU find them to be.

Come, Already! My heart is heavy. It's work to carry it around in my chest. Feels as if I've been given an x-ray apron and instructions to run. If I didn't have this stupid heart, it would be easier. Oh yes easier.

Is it wrong to be so sensitive?

I think PMS kicks my ass every month and I'm suprised by it every time.

Pillar of Pants.

Hello all,

I have been inspired to take an inventory by many things this blustery evening. I am inspired by reading Christmas blogs, and Christmas e-mails from people I haven't heard from in ages. Also inspired by reading the bible and praying this evening with Tim on the phone. Nothing I like better than pointing and snickering at the patriarchs only to realize that, we too, are hopeless broken pieces of creation. Nothing better thing than finding those truths in the crinkly pages of scripture with someone you care about very much. At any rate, it's time for the year end inventory. Not to be confused with the year-end 'pant' inventory I did today after finally washing every single article of clothing that I own. (I have two plaid pairs, two navy pairs, two long black pairs, two corduroy pairs, one sizzly red pair, two brown pairs, one olive green pair, two khaki pair, two pinstriped pair and two grey pair. Not counting jeans, Capri's and gauchos, I think that's a mighty solid inventory.) The patriarchs measured wealth in goats and sheep and cattle. I think pants are a suitable modern equivalent. That means, I am one blessed cookie. These aren't ordinary pants either.. they are extra long for my 6'2" frame mind you, so I consider myself extra blessed that they even exist in such abundance. Praise God. And I'm so not even being irreverent about that.

"And God said to Lindsey... let the pants come two by two into your closet that is only one cubit by a half cubit in size... "

Anyway.. I have a lot of pants. Which is necessary in my line of work. Construction liaisons can't really wear skirts and be taken seriously, or climb ladders, or scaffolds..(Mom, close your eyes..I don't climb anything dangerous.....and I certainly don't walk around on the roof amongst gaping holes that don't have guardrails...no really).

This is the year Monty moved here. He moved here to meet me. We can't figure out any other reason why he came here, but I am very glad he did. I guess it was also to see the Cards win a World Series... but I think that isn't even a distance second place to him.

So..... in the name of inventory. You've waited a year for it. and here it is without further adieu... the "Best" List of 2006,

Best New Marriages: Dee Dee and Shaun, Phil and Becca, Pat and Katie, Anne and Jim, Daniel and Nicole, Of Course Markus and Annie.

Best New Babies: Dan and Caroline, Blazer and Rachel, Sweeney and uh.. Sweeney, Soon to be Stiles and Shearman..High Honorable Mention to Niece Reese (not really a baby and not really my niece, but precious and wonderful just the same as a 2 year old First Cousin Once Removed).

Best Wedding Reception: Pat and Katie (most because I actually had a date that wasn't ashamed of my dance moves and because it had Scott Sauls gettin' jiggy wit it).

Best Use of Aluminum Foil: This.

Best Honor Received By A Friend: Liz and her amazing work for the black rep which won her beau coup props in the ad community and even more of my adoration... if that is possible. Best Shortening of a Church Name: "Greentree Community Church in Webster Groves" to "Riverside Church".

Best 70th birthday party: My Grandma Merrill's Luau.

Best Boyfriend Ever: Eoin Timothy Montemayor (a.k.a. my diamond in the rough).

Best Grassroots Community Movement: The Thursday nite girls crew at Llwelyns in WG. Whoop Ass, Pub Burgers and Plant Men, Oh My!!

Best Present*: Amy and I going to see the musical Annie at the Fox (*which was my '05 Christmas present).

Best Sermon at Riverside: All of them.

Best Corrective Procedure: Me getting in and out of braces in six months and for *much* less than the price of a small vehicle.

Worst Corrective Procedure: Root Canal.

Saddest but Most "Feel Good" Goodbye: Casey to Chi-town.

Happiest Goodbye: Me to my snaggle tooth (see aforesaid corrective procedure).

Biggest Tragesty (which effectively combines the words "tragedy" and "travesty" into one most heinous word..) \The fact that I haven't been skiing in two years now...Mama ain't happy.

Time that I almost peed my pants: Hanging out at Forsythes with Nick Shea, Casey, Nate, Liz and Dusty. That night was full of spunk.

Best CRB hire: Heather Jobson, awesome.

Best Pool Lessons: Dave and Busters, circa July-ish.

Best Concert: Over the Rhine TWICE once at Cornerstone with Jesse and Ange, and once in St. Louis when I was still trying to pretend I wasn't dating Tim.

Best New Hair Color: Mine going from it's natural dishwater *eh* dark boring blond.. to "PA-ZOW" smokin' hot brunette.

Best Weekend Activity: Grabbing a friend, Liz or Ange, (even Abby on the phone once...) and walking around Forest Park in it's entirety. Two and a half hours of walking. Great for the gams, great for the relationships. Such good, special, de-toxifying times.

Best Random Holiday Gift: Dad giving me a "labor day" present and buying me a snazzy-on sale refubished PUSH mower! Yesssss. Still runs like a top, Dad.

Best night in Downtown St. Louis: The time I went to Mike Shannon's with Monty for the first time, and the night the Cards won the Series. The latter was definitely a plethora of images but the most vivid was a guy running around yelling into his phone very matter-of-factly.."That's a WORLD title, baby.. that's a WORLD title!" I saw the same guy 20 minutes later talking to no one in particular still saying the same thing..."That's a WORLD title, baby.. a WORLD title". St. Louisans LOVE their Cardinals.

Best On Site Assignment: Terre Haute Indiana. Well at least it's a drive, not a flight every week, and at at least it's six months and not six years. At least I got some invaluable experience and got a native guy hired to take my place already so I didn't get stuck out here.

Best Compliment by a Boss: Lindsey, you are a F*&^ing All-Star.

Best Present I Bought Myself: Arrested Developement Season Three: Oh LMAO funny.. Sitting alone in my hotel room laughing out loud.

This year has been one of great reflection, and re-education. It was necessary, but I hope this next year is light on the contemplative and heavy on the action, as I'm ready to get off dead center, and ready to do some shakin... ready to rise up and lay my crown at his wounded feet. I'm ready to jump into life with two feet and ready to grow up some more, and give back some more of the bountiful care that my Savior gives me. Ready to do more little things that matter and not worrying about doing it perfectly, but rather, just worrying about doing it. 'Cause sitting with someone in a nursing home even if you have nothing to say.. and even if she can't hear you anyway..is better than not sitting in a nursing home visiting someone. Ready to be less of a "processor" and more of a "doer" (thank you, TM). I need to be better to my family. I've been such a sucky member of my amazing fam.

Little Miss Sunshine... go rent it.. so good. Such a sweet movie. (thank you LF)

The Bible. Read it again, for the first time. You will see things you didn't see before... I guarantee it. And I guarantee you will be blessed by the evidence of the invisible hand of the very present God in the lives of the people on the pages. You will be awed and amazed and terrified and humbled by the story of the idiots that belong to the Merciful, Mighty God.

And Jacob marked it with a pillar.. he poured out a drink offering and anointed it with oil...because God spoke to him there.

And so... with great joy.. I mark this end of 2006.

(Thanks JC)

Murly Christmas

I have a week off from Indiana, and I already spent a wonderful weekend with my family for Christmas.  This year, for some odd reason, my immediate family decided to open our gifts the day before Christmas Eve.  That meant that Christmas Day was for SLEEPING IN!!!  That equals best Christmas Day ever.  Dinner that day was grilled cheese sandwiches, not even copious ones.  We almost had to use heels, and we definitely had to dip into the cheddar, which, we all know doesn't hold a candle to the melty goodness of velveeta...Then we watched Pirates 2.  I don't care what anyone says, I liked it.  It was an impossible movie to do a sequel to, and I thought it was fabulous.  Can't wait for number three.

 

More Later.. .My body is still digesting the pile of food it ate this week...not enough juices to write....

--
Hey YOU want G-mail?  I can hook you up...
 

Counting Crows.

The trees are heavy with crows. Saturated...I can't even begin to assign a number..thousands? Yes it's thousands. A dark fluid cloud of 58,000 crows plague the city.  Like a scene from a Hitchcock movie, they swarm in a giant amoeba above the tree tops, snagging on the thick branches now and again.    I crane my neck to the front of the window of the truck to see them circling overhead.  The black long arms of the cloud seem to be performing an incantation rite above the cauldron that is Terre Haute.  Aimlessly, they wander, purposeless, dark and strange.

 

I understand that feeling sometimes, my friends.

 

More Shrapnel from my Brain Cloud.

Black Hair Dye, yipes.

Awkward Situations.

Rainy Indiana

Madly in Love

Tripped and Fell over a Rug that was advertising safety in the workplace

Feeling stupid at work

Feeling pretty good at work

Feeling pretty cold at work

Miss my best friends.

Houlihans, Kayaks, Kaldis whatever.

Miss my Missouri Life

Still stuck in Indiana for awhile.

Brother is the best guy on earth, no kiddin.

TM is up there too.

No two guys would I rather have in my man-rig.

Christmas is merry.

Vmars was not on TV last night.

Who else is NOT a fan of Hayley Duff?? what the heck.. you're all "Vote for Summer" and all of a sudden you get to host an award show with Reverend Camden? Pshaw.. as if.

Bible Study teleconferences with TM, unbelievable.

God is so big.

Artie... heh. Heheeheh. HAAHAHA. We all have had imaginary friends, haven't we?

"DO not be afraid, Abram..I am your sheild. Your very great reward." (even though you lied about your wife being your sister twice i am the LORD and I will use you anyway..)

Proof of me being the biggest losesr: Retainers, badges, powercords, alarmclocks, phone chargers, phone numbers, sewer checks, receipts,

Willie and Annie prankin me on the day of Willie's birf. Not fair.. but funny.

Miss volleyball, because I need a vetrinarian.. because my pythons are SICK.

I can't even type that with a straight face.

I wonder how people really see me. I know the way I see me is so distorted.

I wonder how God sees me. My twisted mind says no one could possibly see the good, my sinful nature says the truly bad isn't that bad... how far from the truth.

Beth Moore reunion is new and not a rerun? How can that be?

I wonder if I will ever live as simply and as freely as Jesus would want me to? For my sake, not only his.

I wonder if I will ever make a good mom. I'm so selfish.

I wonder if I will ever trim my toenails again. I'm going for a Guiness over here.

I wonder if JL knows what an idiot she is, what a gold mine she has. Had? Has? who knows.

I wonder if anyone really eats the pickles at the chinese buffet in Terre Haute that are in the big vat inconveniently located next to the cottage cheese compartment... ahem... ew.

I wonder if anyone reads me anymore. I've become sparse.

Biggest Losers is on.. Crying. Slightly comforting to know that in order to lose 50% of my body weight, I would have to chop a leg off. Even thought I eat the sausage biscuits at the Drury Inn breakfast buffet with no shame.

Hotel comforters... can they even be classifed as such?

If you are reading this and you are in Missouri..or Illinois, or Pennsylvania, or California, or Texas, or Minnesota, or Washington....chances are I miss you.

Take Another Very Painful Vote...

What is the WORST part about finding the retainers (that you thought were thrown away by a cleaning lady at the Drury Inn) neatly tucked in the least likely place, the retainer case, that is actually in your purse.

 

A.  You are out 100 bucks.

B.  You had to cancel a perfectly good dentist appointment, miss work, and drive thru an ice storm to get said retainers made.

or

C.  You are just a complete and TOTAL idiot.

 

Oh the horror.
 

Take a Vote

If you leave your retainers in your hotel room on a paper plate on your unmade bed, and the housekeeper throws them away... who should be held responsible for replacing them?

 

A.  You are an Idiot.  Cough up the dough.

B.  You are entitled to some sort of re-imbursement.

 

OR

 

C.   Other (Please specify).

 

BTW, "You" is "me'. 

 

 

Murl's Anatomy

Hello all. For those of you I haven't spoken with in awhile... I took a mini-unscheduled vacation. To the hospital.

Last tuesday I had the stomach flu. I was becoming a pretty good shot, vomiting into the tub while sitting on the toilet, when I decided I needed some help. So my CLIENT came back to my hotel and took me to the ER. Where I was given some fluids and some nausea meds that WIPED me out. So my mom and my Monty drove out to Terre Haute to take me home. Before they arrived I was given fluids so they could get a urine sample. I had been too dehydrated before to give one, so they had to wait a little while. I finally had stopped, ahem, ejecting things, long enough to fall into a drug-induced coma. But apparantly I was getting too comfortable. A bald, giant, earring clad nurse bursts in, wakes me from a good REM sleep flips the light on and demands a sample. I wasn't moving fast enough for him yet, so he unhooks my fluid bag, throws it on the bed and wheels me out the door to the bathroom...which was less than 5 feet from my room. It was so disturbing, like coming out of the womb must have felt. I was cold, disorented, nauseous and surrounded by people in scrubs. He really wanted this sample.. maybe for himself.. maybe he was trying to play football and needed a clean one? Who knows. I asked him if I could have a pink tray before I left the bed.. and he said "What? Oh sure, but.. we refer to those as 'pukin-buckets'!"

Lovely.

I finally was discharged and rode home. The next day and a half I spent in a coma and the world just passed by without me. I didn't answer any e-mail or go to work so I ended up with six impromptu days off, and it was wonderful and tomorrow it will be horrible, but for now, for a few more hours it is still wonderful.

Thanksgiving turned into a mini-vacation and I got to visit a ton of folks. Closest to my heart being my good friend Coralea and her baby boys who I hadn't seen in YEARS. But the oldest son remembered me and both boys were so adorable and loving. Most kids I'm around are shy and not so quick to warm up to strangers, but these two didn't have that problem, I think it is an environmental thing. Check out these cuties!

Shards of Skull... the name of my new cover band...if I had a cover band...

Many tings.
My roomate Katie's weddin. Much belated post on the week-ago event... but Indiana happens.


Anywho. Great time. Ended up being a mini-DR reunion special.. Tons of old familiar wonderful faces.. speaking of faces.. This was my super-slick trick on Markus and JRo...


So super... so slick...so unnoticed.. so captured for-ever on film...




Willie!'s attempt at revenge didn't fare so well, totally knew he was there, and captured the pit stain for-ever on film.... :)


In other Katie and Patrick wedding related news... I "hosted" a part of the wedding party at my place, which would have been fantastic... except I picked that weekend to have my sewer pipes replaced in the front yard. In a deft flash of brilliance and planning skill, I had a bobcat and several savory characters in my front yard, a giant truck blocking my drive, seven women in the house and a pile of poo in my basement.

Got that cabled out after the fact and find to my horror, that the bobcat and his band of merry men did not unclog my clot, didn't straighten my sewer... didn't really help my problem. My problem may be under the house, where no man can go...

So stay tuned for the continuing saga of my money pit. I'm sure it will be blog-worthy.

Thankfully, Tim helped me clean up before when went and saw The Departed.. which by far gets my vote as best use of skull shards in a dramatic action film. Loved Leo in that one.. Hate Leo in everything else..

This week I blew a tire on the rented Jeep Liberty.

Good thing I had some good ole' boys there to help me change the tire.. It was a cold, rainy, bone-chilling, frosty windy, not warm 'Cheeseburgers in Paradise' parking lot in lovely urban-sprawling Terre Haute.

Of note.. the good old boy number one asks me where my jack is on the jeep.. since it's not mine, I do not know offhand. They take off on a 21 point inpection of the vehicle to locate said jack.

I look in the manual...The other female in the car says sarcastically under her breath... "Now Lindsey, why would you look in the manual?" I am the first jill to the jack.

O-E-yes!

Warning... Enginerd humor. Safe to say the whole room was crakin up when maybe the dearest little Indian Man on earth dropped the following bombs-o-funny. .

Structural Engineer: "We should put a note that says... Don't drill through beams...seems obvious, but I think it needs to be said."
Structural Engineer, disdainfully, on what scale to draw certain section in: "3/32 is a bastard scale".
Structural Engineer on which floors to pour: "Do the second first and then the first second."

Love that guy.

V Mars slips in the Murl ratings..

Before: After:

Yes.. Jim, Mark, basically I'm dissappointed with VMars after her big change to the CW. They took the best TV detective/comedy/drama and made it the O.C! The show started out with Veronica being a junior in high school with a big story line, great deeply developed characters.. from the gold-hearted motorcycle gang leader, to the confused sarcastic lovable bad boy, to the bumbling simple minded local sheriff who you love to hate, and taken it and scrubbed it of all it's unique-ness and turned it into a typical college drama. Shouldn't the writers have known from the examples of 90210 and Saved by the Bell, that you CAN'T transition a high school drama into a college one effectively... heck.. you can't even do it in real life. This season of VMars has turned Veronica into a jealous "girly-girl", had dropped or ignored HUGE plot lines (maybe because actors didn't return for this season.. but we are just left hanging on major parts of the story..like where is Duncan? Where is her mom? There is no emphasis on the relationship between her and Wallace.. (which is one of the best story lines, and relationships they had going). Ugh.. and NOW her Dad (who also constitutes one of the best Father-daughter acts of all time) is having an affair with a married woman. BOOOO, I say.. HISS BOO. Another example to follow many others of a show that had GREAT potential and was so different, turned into every other pop show on TV.

Yeah. I was scared to admit it.. but I'm not happy. I will say the first two seasons are some of the best work I've seen on TV, and this third season leaves me with an "eh" feeling.

Don't get me wrong.. it's still a good show.. it just used to be a great show.

And it make me sad.

Bold, Scandalous Hope

Ok. So I think I've had a revelation. Not one that I haven't had before... but somehow it seems to have more stick power, and less emotion driven as previous "yay-God-type" revelations. Ever since my bff Angela mentioned the lack of a "Bold Hope" driving back from Greenville, the ring of that phrase hasn't left my brain. There are so many reasons to be cynical. Countless reasons. It is absolutely justifiable to be hard, and cold and self-protective and to look out for number one. It really makes a lot of sense. Good advice from the 'wiser' older to the younger. Watch out for you, because no one else will. My spirit is crushed daily with the weight of this world, I stood at the polls today wanting to kick the booth over with angst for the lack of real solutions, I see the droves of homeless around Monty's loft and I want to get a bull horn and chant "GET A JOB" out the side of the car, but I also want to make them sandwiches, but I don't want them to mug me. (How awful am I?), I want to take the fowl mouthed people who yell at each other on the reality shows and I want to force them to watch video of themselves while tied to a chair, but I keep watching them while not tied to anything. I want all politicians put in a boxing ring in sumo suits with built in tasers and let them fight to the death. I want fat people to be thin, I want emaciated people to eat, I want the sick to be healed and I want wrong to be RIGHT. But how? It's overwhelming to the perfectionist in me that says ALL or NOTHING. But there is one BIG giant reason to be hopeful. And that reason is that God is at work. And the God of scripture DOES have power and has purpose and is all that is good and light in the world. It is all things worth forwarding in an e-mail that warm your heart, it's all things that are so beautiful, that stand out against the stark white cold hardness of the world we live in. They are often very small things. The diary of Anne Frank was a very small thing. Very small words from a little teenaged girl, in the midst of a hurricane of hate and tragedy. Those whispered words spoke much louder and lasted much longer than the Hilters did. The trials of Martin Luther King Jr. who was up against violence and hate whose voice now rings out victoriously in a world that more and more (I feel) sees people being judged by the content of their character. In a backyard example...I see men like Monty. He may be unpolished on the surface..the things he says make me cringe sometimes, he may have scary tattos, but his heart is one that is beautiful. He loves people who can't love him back. He loves people who have hurt him.. loves them radically, even monitarily and wouldn't imagine playing it any other way. He cares for people whose lives are messy, and he gets into the mess for them. He loves freely and often and doesn't count costs before deciding to love. He isn't ruled by fear. Period. He isn't concerned with appearances, says what he thinks and isn't afraid to be wrong. He feels things and isn't afraid to feel what he's feeling, fully and completely. Isn't afraid to chase after a girl who dumped him. Is isn't afraid of anything really..except God. Mmkey that was a mush-fest-over...sorry. With all of the examples I could give of the merits of hoping, of trying. I still I see people, including myself, plugging into a world that wont heal. It refuses medicine, it refuses love, it refuses to drink, it refuses to breathe. I get too smart for myself sometimes because i don't "see" God working. Or it seems better and smarter to play the odds that things are going to turn out badly, that people are going to hurt you and that life is going to dissappoint you terribly if you start getting this "hoping" notion into your head. Can we rise up? We are engaged in an epic battle (oh geez John Eldridge...) and it is a grand shame that i forget it so often, because I'm surrounded by smart people who don't believe. People I admire for their brains and talent, who can't see what I can see. And it, honestly, makes me feel a bit stupid. It makes the little girl in me stick her chin out and fold her arms and choke back hot angry tears. B-but he IS real. Why wont you see? Oh ok, to maintain the 'coolness' factor, I'll take my God down a notch. I'll what? Am I serious? I can do no such thing. May God not smite me. I can't because it isn't true. It shames me to say that these are my thoughts. I pound the nails in further. My revelation is this. It's ok to hope. It's the better deal. And I'm going to...damn it. Don't care who thinks I'm a Pollyanna. I don't care. I have reason for hope. I mean the Cardinals won a freakin' World Series this year... ANYTHING is possible... ;)