Thoughts on messes.

I am in love. With a woman. My cleaning lady.


We'll call her Diane. Because that is her name. Folks... I know that it seems a little bit like cheating to get a cleaning lady, a little, shall we say.. extravagant? But TRRRUST me. This lady, for a measly 20bucks an hour makes my life easier. What's weirder, is that she seems to love doing it. I had her come over this past Tuesday and I was promising myself to not be one of those peeps who cleans their house before the cleaning lady comes over, but I couldn't help it.. I was straightening and fussing the night before like a goon. Didn't seem to matter, this gal came in, and it almost brought a tear to my eye to see THROUGH my glass shower doors once again. I didn't think it would ever be possible. I didn't think I could ever let Cary Murphy see my house ever again. But now, I'd let her eat off my shower doors. I'm not sure how that would work, maybe I'd spray someting jam-like on them and squeegee it onto some toast? Dunno. Anyway...it was one more task I got to take off my list of things to do that week. It totally freed me up to not feel guilty about not doing it again, and getting back to living life. I don't know if I'll become a regular or just get quick fixes once in awhile (is this how drug addicts start?) but I do know that it was SUCH a blessing WELL worth my time and money. May I suggest similar gifts to any and all moms out there for this upcoming holiday?

May I suggest not getting your hair dyed three times in one day? I hate my hair right now. For it to be my natural dirty blonde color ever again, I will need to Sinead it all off or let it grow striped-ly out. Two-tone Malone.

For those of you privy to the cleaning lady discussion, I had this post crafted before that conversation came up.. so don't think I'm beating this dead horse to a bloody pulp.

But do think that I am amazed and awed, humbled and happy to be clean.

I have finally done it.. lost the last retainer in my set of four. In less than six months I have lost six total pieces. One to a lawn mower, one to a church gymnasium, two to a random place I have yet to figure out, no make that three, and now, one to Qdoba. I'm a mess.

Why is that Lady Screaming?

A portion of one of my engineering drawings. Monty says: "Why is that Lady Screaming?"

Ramen Noodles

Great people go to my church. It's really cool. Props to Mary Schawacker. Cool lady. Makes the place run like a top.


"If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even ‘sinners’ love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even ‘sinners’ do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even ‘sinners’ lend to ‘sinners,’ expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful."


Nice walk today with a most excellent companion.


Nice burning on the top of my red feet. I have been known to be allergic to certain types of carpet fibers... Which is nice. No more dancing and being silly for me!
The palms of my hands swelled up as well. Strange freaky freak-ness.


Nice Dinner and Movie company on Friday night. Fracture is a good flick, go see it. See if you can figure it out.

My brother shattered his personal best record this weekend at 474 YARDS. That's right. YARDS... that almost five football fields and thirty past his last PB.


I love my hammock. LOVE IT.


I love my yard. I love spring in St. Louis


Love love love.


Grace like Rain.

Guitar Playing Goat

Gray, quiet and tired and mean

Picking at a worried seam

I try to make you mad at me over the phone.

Red, eyes and fire and signs

I'm taken by a nursery rhyme

I want to make a ray of sunshine and never leave home

No amount of coffee, no amount of crying

No amount of whiskey, no amount of wine

No, nothing else will do

I've gotta have you, I've gotta have you.

The road gets cold, there's no spring in the middle this year

I'm the new chicken clucking open hearts and ears

Oh, such a prima donna, sorry for myself

But green, it is also summer

And I won't be warm till I'm lying in your arms

I see it all through a telescope: guitar, suitcase, and a warm coat

Lying in the back of the blue boat, humming a tune...

Lines from the Weepies are running through my head. As much as I wish that Jane wasn't so perfect at being my musical barometer, she is. I like a lot of the music she so graciously sends me. It feels like cheating. Like I didn't dig around fifty music festivals and find these diamonds in the rough, it almost feels like I'm not allowed to lay claim to the music that steals her heart as mine. But once you drive through the stiffling rain, broken wiper banging on something that it shouldn't be banging on, and find yourself flipping the arrowed buttons on the steering wheel to the tracks that sing YOUR life, you really cannot help yourself. They feel like an old college buddies, hugging your heart and letting you know...Hey girl, I been there... and I sang about it..and we danced to it.

"Sometimes rain that's needed falls, We float like two lovers in a painting by Chagall, All around is sky and blue town, Holding these flowers for a wedding gown, We live so high above the ground, satellites surround us.

"I am humbled in this city, There seems to be an endless sea of people like us, Wakeful dreamers, I pass them on the sunlit streets In our rooms filled with laughter, We make hope from every small disaster, Everybody says "you can't, you can't, you can't, don't try." Still everybody says that if they had the chance they'd fly like we do."

Just wow...

2006

2007

What a difference almost a year makes....Case, I'm glad we have taken turns each looking somewhat normal in each of these pics...

He Said.

He said to her in her foul, depressed, icky mood:
"I love you more when you are like this."
"How is that possible?" she asks.
He said.. "Because that's when you need it more."

Birth Pains and Hope

It is said that people should live more in the moment.

I don't think I'm one of those people. I think I live too much in the moment.

The sky is drizzly and cold grey like the scarf I'm knitting. My muscles are tight and knotted with tension of a soul that cannot find it's Jesus. Can not find it's peace.

Perhaps it really is the illusion that they say it is. That contentment is never really found. That mostly you get out of the creaky bed in the cold grey half-hour late morning and you put one foot gingerly on the creaky cold hard wood and you take another step...and another... take a shower, sing a little... let the hot water work out your knotted muscles and your sore, world weary back.

And you breathe and you laugh and pray and breathe and wander and waffle and you wonder about the point. You wonder if you are doing "it" right... whatever "it" is. I have never quite felt that I am doing "it" right. I think sometimes I wrongly live for what other people want, at other times I think I'm only living for myself. I am so terrified of not being perfect.

Ladies, let me be frank, is it so abnormal for a woman not to want to be a CEO? Check that... knowing ME is it weird that I don't want to be a CEO? I am not built for it. In my young life, by the worlds standards I am highly sucessful. Especially considering that if you have a roof over your head you are considered among the richest people in the world. I have a roof AND a basement. Granted it's a basement that has crushed pipes and drippy valves and a furnace that sounds like an old man, but still it is real estate nonetheless...

I'm built for knitting and cleaning and smiling. Giving grace and hanging pictures and making art and writing and mourning and dancing. I want hot glue guns and a garden, a swiffer vacuum and mini-muffins.

I do live in the moment, oh yes. So much so that those close to me think me a bit fickle...crying one minute, laughing at a commercial the next.

I feel my pains, I feel joys, I feel things that remind me that I'm, indeed, alive. But I am still in a prison of sorts. I give it different names, but it's bars are made of shame. Shame for not being ambitious enough. Shame for having an attitude that says "I just don't WANNA". But I will because I hafta! I think the elders are all right. About most things, really.

I do not like being told what to do. The times in my life where I show the least grace to people does not have to do with substance abuse, sexual immorality, abortions, homelessness, rage, greed, or wrath... to those sins I find my heart tender and compassionate.. my hate wells up and boils when I am condescended on. When people tell me what to do and how to do it like there is no other option I do not like it. Because I am certain that no human is ever right all the time... Not even me. I don't know why it irks me so, but it irks me like nothing else.

Proverbs 29:23
A man's pride brings him low, but a man of lowly spirit gains honor...

there seemes to be no sin in the bible that is more punished than pride...

I have enough of it...

Jeremiah 49:16
The terror you inspire and the pride of your heart have deceived you, you who live in the clefts of the rocks, who occupy the heights of the hill. Though you build your nest as high as the eagle's, from there I will bring you down," declares the LORD.

I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself. My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord who judges me. Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait till the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of men's hearts. At that time each will receive his praise from God.

I tremble.. who can stand?

Can I go where He went?

Hooray for:

Being wrapped in blankets and belly laughs on my front porch with wine and a backdrop of spice bushes and tulips.
Cowboy Boyd's Rasperry Chipotle Salsa.
Beautiful Upstate New York.
Trips to Chicago, Superdawg and the House of Blues.
Buildings that disappear into the clouds at night.
Seeing where my boy grew up. Seeing how he grew up.
Growing up.
DietCoke,DietCoke,DietCoke,DietCoke,DietCoke,DietCoke,DietCoke...
Margarita on the Rocks!
Mowing the front lawn.
Getting the Mini-Muffin recipe that I have been begging for for years and years, given to my by the folks who consider me the daughter they never had.
Liz visiting my church.
Angela eating my vegan nuggets.
Charlie Brown Christmas.
Huge wheels of cheese on the salad bar at dinner.
Humility. From Pastors, Associate Pastors, Boyfriends, and self.
Baby showers bring May flowers, and pens wrapped in flowers, and flower seeds, and cookies shaped like flowers.
Notorious D's Mom.
Easter.
A date for Forest Park.
Leviticus 8.
My boyfriend getting a sexy new ride.
My funny co-workers who actually get my jokes.
Jesus. Sweet Jesus. Whom I need to pour grace on me, whom I need to carry me, whom I need to teach me.
Al-be-coy-kee.

You are Indescribable

I must have blinked.  It feels like I got on a plane back in early March and it was snowing sideways, and this morning there was a beautiful tree outside my window in it's white blossomy robe.   When did this happen?  Where did winter go?

 

Last year I felt I was starting to thaw out at about this time.  This year feels just as significant, and even more so, yet I can't figure out the word that goes with it. 

 

I have much to say, much to praise, much to mourn.

 

But not today. 

 

Today I soak.

 

Three double oh.

My very second post ever was about one of my most favorite books. 'Gates of Fire' by Steven Pressfeld, depicting the 300 Spartans that held off the Massive Persian Army in a narrow mountain pass for three days.

I always thought it would make a great movie. And it did. I went and saw 300 with Monty and Duster and it was awesome. I guess it got bad reviews, and I was a little scared to see it but this is one of my favorite stories of all time and I felt they did a good job with it. Except for some perhaps unecessary skin.

Where is the honor? Where has honor gone?

Those men would have rather died than live with dishonor. Fires me up I tell ya.

Unbelievable. It's based on a comic book series that was based on a true event, the story portrayed had a little more mythological fantastical license, but the basic story is the same. I do not know why this particular story strikes such a chord with me...

Go see it.. it's good.

Since everyone else is....

Upon returning from vacation and checking blogs most have mentioned, in some form, their favorite college basketball team and their faring in the Madness. I have similar news. The Division III basketball world is already knee-deep into it's madness, and this year both the women AND men from Washington University are going to the Final Four!
This is awesome because it's the men's first time EVER to go, and it's the women's first time to go since I graduated in 2001. The women started this year 1-3 lost their starting point guard to a knee injury and have finished 29-5 overall in true Bear fashion. They have not been a dominate team, but they have found ways to win, and at this time of the year, I think that is more important. Read about them HERE I give my "Yeah Bears" salute. I'll be listening in "washed-up has-been" style this Friday at 6pm eastern on my computer if anyone is looking for me. I've been gone awhile and you all may have forgotten that I exist. I still live in the same house, I have just returned from a much-needed, very restful 10-day vacation. Ski and surf. I did nothing but eat, it seemed, so I have gained about 15 pounds which I look forward to sheding with the advent of spring and the resuming of competitive sports. I still love my long lost friends who I look forward to seeing with the termination of my sentence in Indiana-ville. (ONE MORE WEEK!!!) I still have a boyfriend whose parents I was visiting out in LA for a few days. He still lives here and will be back in a week as well. I have now officially had an IN-n-OUT burger, and have seen a sunset in La Jolla, got a massage in CO, did some skiing, saw some dear friends and took a spin through the Denver Art museum, ate lunch on a roof across from Coors field, and was then subsequently attacked with a debilitating case of the sniffles. I finally gave up and just jammed a tissue up my schnoz and left it there for the duration of the flight. Hey? I ask you, what is more embarrasing: that, or having your nose spontaneously and uncontrollably drip liquid on the magazine your seat mate is reading? Yeah...snot-wick it is. I hope you missed me, I missed you.
I lead a charmed life. Time to start a new season of it. I don't know what it will bring. I have no guarantees. I have a potential new project at work in the works.. (a LOCAL one!) and other than that... I do not know what lies ahead for me. The future is a blackened chicken sandwich... no.. er.. I mean a blackened hole of unknown-ness. I feel rested but scared, and hopeful yet terrified, and answers seem obvious yet impossible to carry out. I went to the retreat...I know God only sees the good, yet I feel he must be disappointed in me, in my selfishness. In spending an absurd amount of money on vacations and massages and movies, yet I didn't miss the little glimpses he left for me: the exit row seat on EVERY leg of every flight (even when I had a "B" boarding pass, the arrival of jane lee's delicious Christmas mix just before I am ready to get into the car for hopefully one last drive to Indiana...

I saw Him in the fact that the condo we stayed in had amongst it's game collection a DELUXE edition of Scrabble, four willing and able participants, and a rocky mountain-ous view that God painted himself...just for me.

I saw Him in the sea lions and their adorable two-by-two waddlings as they sunned themselves on the sand.

I saw Him in the beautiful little four year old I had dinner with. We drew animals on her notepad for two hours.

I saw Him in the vastness of the ocean and in the hospitality of old and new friends.

I saw Him in the embrace of someone who knows me, really knows me, and somehow, someway, loves me still.

I saw Him in the tears.

Takin' a Break..

I am going to be in SoCal visiting for five days and then I'm going to be shooshing down the slopes for a few days in Colorado.

 

I need this...

 

I have been neglecting my blog but when I get back...look out!

 

Exodus 29, (click me...)

Catching Up

Snow fell. It silences and softens a crackly withered landscape. It forces you to be still a little bit. To breathe. To sigh. To smile and shrug your shoulders up a little bit.
Backed into a garage waiting for 21 to arrive. Silently, Prayerfully. Who is this guy?



I'm starting to know. It's terrifyingly exciting and dependable and secure all at the same time.



I'm starting to know less and less about more and more. And it's ok. No one likes a know it all. Like why is it better to sit in public and not hold the hand of the person you are crazy about? Surrounded by sullen married people in a restaurant both saddened and angered me. (no mom, not you and dad.. you two are anything but sullen). What was the point? Choose joy for pete's sake. Choose to be enamored, choose to have some fellowship. Choose to talk about more than dumb gross surface things. Cant we talk about the deep stuff? Why do we avoid community like the plague? Why do we pretend it's all we want when we do not really want it? There things we are carrying with us that we shouldn't carry alone.


There used to be a tirade here..but I decided it's not real.. I'm just looking for a softer place to land. Anyone?


I need to be more forgiving. More understanding. Lord have mercy.


I need to moisturize. Brisk Indiana winds have ripped off my skin cells by the trillion. Leaving a tight crunchy surface that threatens to start a fire on my polyester hotel 'comforter'. Anybody need a blade sharpened? Take my left heel...


I need to not be black headed anymore. My "caRcasian" scalp burned with the second dose of chemicals of the day. Not cool. Blond roots are not cool.



New boots are cool.



Talking to sweet wonderful Angela is cool. I think she was put on this earth so that I wouldn't be alone. To think a thought is to have her understand it, speak truth to it, and not judge it, all in the same turn. She is my dearest. She is my girl crush and I will shout it from the rooftops. I will ride my tooth bike to Indiana talking to her on the phone for the rest of my days. Seems unfair that I don't get more credit for appreciating her in the kingdom of God. You know.. because it's upside down and all. You get more brownie points for learning to like the un-likeable.. but Angie is so stinkin likeable she blows my heavenly handicap! Dirty!

The team got back together this weekend to celebrate one of the most shining examples of humanity that I know. I can't really put adequate words to Alia, how sweet, genuine and just angelically good that she is. She and her unborn baby 'Timalia' and her family were here this past weekend along with some others. It is always good times to reunite and remember one of the best functional groups of people that I have ever been a part of. Out of the blue, T-Raj came to the festivites Friday night with a most interesting and unexpected aura. Bubbly, happy, speaking of 'being in church' which thrills me, and raises a zillion questions that I can't ask.
Alia and I kinda have "mirrored" images of hair... nice part yes? I also forget how tall she it.. I was wearin flats, but she towers over me.. Don't be fooled.

AND Don't you ever count out a basketball team that is under Coach Nancy Fahey. A team which stated out the season 1-3 or something has blossomed into a contender in the UAA, after losing their starting point guard who was last years rookie of the year, and graduating their leading scorer from last year who dropped 23 a game! A team with two healthy seniors on it, a senior playing with a bionic shoulder and the rest, inexperienced sophomores. They went 2-0 this weekend and into sole possesion of first in the UAA. It's the halfway point and the road trips are infront of us, not behind us... so it's still early. But just goes to show you what an amazing program Washington University womens b-ball really is. Ok I may be a LITTLE biased. But this is the first time we've been underdogs. Which is a scary place to put us. Go ahead leave us out of the top 25 ranking for the first time in nine years... see what happens with that. See how that goes for ya. It's hoops time and I'm fired up.

This is Great...

Great weekend all in all. I gotta start off with something that made me laugh in that way that I do when I can't breathe.

I'm sitting on the bleachers watching the Wash U NYU game this past Sunday, all of a sudden, I see this long oblong thing out of the corner of my eye...rolling. Rolling exactly parallel to the court...rolling so fast. Then I see a sandy haired little boy chasing after the object I at first thought it was a cigar or something... The gal I was sitting with then identifies the object and exclaims: "Whoop, runaway hotdog!" Oh that thing was rollin' so fast, I don't know how it got going quite that fast.. but the kid had obviously dropped it. The kid chases it down, before it goes onto the court and scoops it up and slaps it into the bun. "Five Second Rule".

I wish you could have seen this hotdog. Rolled evenly in court dirt. It was awesome. Wash u has the best hotdogs.. they are much like the ones you could get at Busch Stadium.

I don't think this was quite as funny to anyone else.. but I was DYING. It was just rolling so fast... oh the runaway hotdog... I swear I'm sitting here laughing just thinking of it.

One Day More

Wow. What a difference a day makes. Just A day ago, I was not communicating well with my man, fighting with co-workers, feelin groggy, didn't drink a monster ('monster' being the new favorite low-cal low-carb energy bervage that some describe as liquid cocaine) lost two of three in a marathon volleyball match and mistook Phil Woods for my boyfriend on the phone... it was traumatic, don't ask.

Today started off with a Monster! (mmmm mama like...) Ended with all being right with the world again. In the space between, I : A. reconnected with one of my best grade school friends from Texas via the myspace world, B. Was so stinkin proud of my Monty on the radio today talking about how the parents of the Hornbeck boy are nuts for putting that kid on Oprah so soon after the trauma. C. Went to ON TAP and realized I have come a long LONG way in my struggle to see myself as beautiful. D. Received a free stay at the company condo! Woo Hoo. E. Got some fresh advice from a co-worker in the matters of life that matter. F. Got some good work done today. G. Read more Exodus. H. Resurrected my love for chicken parts with the advent of a new poppyseed dressing. Something I 've always loved about processed compressed breaded chicken matter slathered in the gooey sweetness of poppyseed sauce. Love it. It's strange and it's going to kill me on day, but I'll die happy.

I'm sure there were more good things. Many more. It is good when it takes more energy to count ones blessings than it does to count ones pains. Some will point and call me a Pollyanna. I will not care.

I will have joy. Just a smidge... on toast points. You must try one.

"Everybody Loves You?"

And other phrases that inspire neurosis....

"Bless your Heart"
"I very much like your dress, it does wonders for your figure"
"Has anyone ever told you that you remind them of Courtney Love?"

I thought I would have more of these...

Feel free to add your favorite non-complimentary compliment.

Tired

I'm tired of fighting.
I'm not made for it. But you, Lord, massive, mighty Lord, are in control.
I'm not made to pave my own way.. I'm not built for the war for truth. I'm quite certain I'm not even built for this world. I have tried to become that which life has required me to be.
I've tried hard to be the girl that can take care of herself. But time and time again, I fail miserably.
I try to obtain significance.

Jesus.. if only I believed that you are my sole source of significance.

If I could only convince the world that I AM significant because of you. If only they would recognize your blood on me.

If only I found everyone else in my life as significant as YOU find them to be.

Come, Already! My heart is heavy. It's work to carry it around in my chest. Feels as if I've been given an x-ray apron and instructions to run. If I didn't have this stupid heart, it would be easier. Oh yes easier.

Is it wrong to be so sensitive?

I think PMS kicks my ass every month and I'm suprised by it every time.

Pillar of Pants.

Hello all,

I have been inspired to take an inventory by many things this blustery evening. I am inspired by reading Christmas blogs, and Christmas e-mails from people I haven't heard from in ages. Also inspired by reading the bible and praying this evening with Tim on the phone. Nothing I like better than pointing and snickering at the patriarchs only to realize that, we too, are hopeless broken pieces of creation. Nothing better thing than finding those truths in the crinkly pages of scripture with someone you care about very much. At any rate, it's time for the year end inventory. Not to be confused with the year-end 'pant' inventory I did today after finally washing every single article of clothing that I own. (I have two plaid pairs, two navy pairs, two long black pairs, two corduroy pairs, one sizzly red pair, two brown pairs, one olive green pair, two khaki pair, two pinstriped pair and two grey pair. Not counting jeans, Capri's and gauchos, I think that's a mighty solid inventory.) The patriarchs measured wealth in goats and sheep and cattle. I think pants are a suitable modern equivalent. That means, I am one blessed cookie. These aren't ordinary pants either.. they are extra long for my 6'2" frame mind you, so I consider myself extra blessed that they even exist in such abundance. Praise God. And I'm so not even being irreverent about that.

"And God said to Lindsey... let the pants come two by two into your closet that is only one cubit by a half cubit in size... "

Anyway.. I have a lot of pants. Which is necessary in my line of work. Construction liaisons can't really wear skirts and be taken seriously, or climb ladders, or scaffolds..(Mom, close your eyes..I don't climb anything dangerous.....and I certainly don't walk around on the roof amongst gaping holes that don't have guardrails...no really).

This is the year Monty moved here. He moved here to meet me. We can't figure out any other reason why he came here, but I am very glad he did. I guess it was also to see the Cards win a World Series... but I think that isn't even a distance second place to him.

So..... in the name of inventory. You've waited a year for it. and here it is without further adieu... the "Best" List of 2006,

Best New Marriages: Dee Dee and Shaun, Phil and Becca, Pat and Katie, Anne and Jim, Daniel and Nicole, Of Course Markus and Annie.

Best New Babies: Dan and Caroline, Blazer and Rachel, Sweeney and uh.. Sweeney, Soon to be Stiles and Shearman..High Honorable Mention to Niece Reese (not really a baby and not really my niece, but precious and wonderful just the same as a 2 year old First Cousin Once Removed).

Best Wedding Reception: Pat and Katie (most because I actually had a date that wasn't ashamed of my dance moves and because it had Scott Sauls gettin' jiggy wit it).

Best Use of Aluminum Foil: This.

Best Honor Received By A Friend: Liz and her amazing work for the black rep which won her beau coup props in the ad community and even more of my adoration... if that is possible. Best Shortening of a Church Name: "Greentree Community Church in Webster Groves" to "Riverside Church".

Best 70th birthday party: My Grandma Merrill's Luau.

Best Boyfriend Ever: Eoin Timothy Montemayor (a.k.a. my diamond in the rough).

Best Grassroots Community Movement: The Thursday nite girls crew at Llwelyns in WG. Whoop Ass, Pub Burgers and Plant Men, Oh My!!

Best Present*: Amy and I going to see the musical Annie at the Fox (*which was my '05 Christmas present).

Best Sermon at Riverside: All of them.

Best Corrective Procedure: Me getting in and out of braces in six months and for *much* less than the price of a small vehicle.

Worst Corrective Procedure: Root Canal.

Saddest but Most "Feel Good" Goodbye: Casey to Chi-town.

Happiest Goodbye: Me to my snaggle tooth (see aforesaid corrective procedure).

Biggest Tragesty (which effectively combines the words "tragedy" and "travesty" into one most heinous word..) \The fact that I haven't been skiing in two years now...Mama ain't happy.

Time that I almost peed my pants: Hanging out at Forsythes with Nick Shea, Casey, Nate, Liz and Dusty. That night was full of spunk.

Best CRB hire: Heather Jobson, awesome.

Best Pool Lessons: Dave and Busters, circa July-ish.

Best Concert: Over the Rhine TWICE once at Cornerstone with Jesse and Ange, and once in St. Louis when I was still trying to pretend I wasn't dating Tim.

Best New Hair Color: Mine going from it's natural dishwater *eh* dark boring blond.. to "PA-ZOW" smokin' hot brunette.

Best Weekend Activity: Grabbing a friend, Liz or Ange, (even Abby on the phone once...) and walking around Forest Park in it's entirety. Two and a half hours of walking. Great for the gams, great for the relationships. Such good, special, de-toxifying times.

Best Random Holiday Gift: Dad giving me a "labor day" present and buying me a snazzy-on sale refubished PUSH mower! Yesssss. Still runs like a top, Dad.

Best night in Downtown St. Louis: The time I went to Mike Shannon's with Monty for the first time, and the night the Cards won the Series. The latter was definitely a plethora of images but the most vivid was a guy running around yelling into his phone very matter-of-factly.."That's a WORLD title, baby.. that's a WORLD title!" I saw the same guy 20 minutes later talking to no one in particular still saying the same thing..."That's a WORLD title, baby.. a WORLD title". St. Louisans LOVE their Cardinals.

Best On Site Assignment: Terre Haute Indiana. Well at least it's a drive, not a flight every week, and at at least it's six months and not six years. At least I got some invaluable experience and got a native guy hired to take my place already so I didn't get stuck out here.

Best Compliment by a Boss: Lindsey, you are a F*&^ing All-Star.

Best Present I Bought Myself: Arrested Developement Season Three: Oh LMAO funny.. Sitting alone in my hotel room laughing out loud.

This year has been one of great reflection, and re-education. It was necessary, but I hope this next year is light on the contemplative and heavy on the action, as I'm ready to get off dead center, and ready to do some shakin... ready to rise up and lay my crown at his wounded feet. I'm ready to jump into life with two feet and ready to grow up some more, and give back some more of the bountiful care that my Savior gives me. Ready to do more little things that matter and not worrying about doing it perfectly, but rather, just worrying about doing it. 'Cause sitting with someone in a nursing home even if you have nothing to say.. and even if she can't hear you anyway..is better than not sitting in a nursing home visiting someone. Ready to be less of a "processor" and more of a "doer" (thank you, TM). I need to be better to my family. I've been such a sucky member of my amazing fam.

Little Miss Sunshine... go rent it.. so good. Such a sweet movie. (thank you LF)

The Bible. Read it again, for the first time. You will see things you didn't see before... I guarantee it. And I guarantee you will be blessed by the evidence of the invisible hand of the very present God in the lives of the people on the pages. You will be awed and amazed and terrified and humbled by the story of the idiots that belong to the Merciful, Mighty God.

And Jacob marked it with a pillar.. he poured out a drink offering and anointed it with oil...because God spoke to him there.

And so... with great joy.. I mark this end of 2006.

(Thanks JC)

Murly Christmas

I have a week off from Indiana, and I already spent a wonderful weekend with my family for Christmas.  This year, for some odd reason, my immediate family decided to open our gifts the day before Christmas Eve.  That meant that Christmas Day was for SLEEPING IN!!!  That equals best Christmas Day ever.  Dinner that day was grilled cheese sandwiches, not even copious ones.  We almost had to use heels, and we definitely had to dip into the cheddar, which, we all know doesn't hold a candle to the melty goodness of velveeta...Then we watched Pirates 2.  I don't care what anyone says, I liked it.  It was an impossible movie to do a sequel to, and I thought it was fabulous.  Can't wait for number three.

 

More Later.. .My body is still digesting the pile of food it ate this week...not enough juices to write....

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