In 2nd grade Mrs. Butcher would always have us start our Monday writings off with "This weekend I..."

I think mine would have read like this:
"This weekend I went to eat supper at Angela's house. She is my friend. She made salsa. It was so good, it had corn, and beans, and avocados, and onions, and tomatoes in it. Her other friends were there. They have kids. They were sooooo cute. We laughed and laughed.

Then I went out to a bar in Dogtown for Cinco de Mayo. My friends were there. It took me awhile to find them. I found them. I left sad.

Saturday, I got up early. I met Bill, Rich, and Kyle for golf. It was cold and wet. But then it was nice. I played well. We ate hamburgers and drank beer. I won a prize. I went home after that and took a nap. My hair was wet after showering. When I woke up it stuck out in funny directions, but I didn't care. Deana called and we got dinner with our friends and saw a movie. It was a movie about gymnastics. It was very very good.

My friends came over to my house and played a game, but Anne fell asleep on the couch.

Sunday I slept through church because I felt bad. I got up and went to work. I went to my basketball game. We lost. It sucked.

Then I drove home. I need an oil change, and gas. I got the gas. Still need the oil change.

I ate fish with my family. My Aunt talked. My Aunt other cried. I love them very much. I love fish very much.

I lost my ATM card in the machine. It got shredded. I don't have my other credit card and last night I wrote my last check. I am a genius. A genius with no money. I've been bumming cash and eating stale graham crackers. Lindsey is stupid. Lindsey can't find things. Lindsey got a quality report back on a design she did saying that she didn't use commas in the appropriate places....

I BLAME YOU MRS. BUTCHER!!!