Thursday, November 17, 2005

Eaten Alive by Wolverines or the Garage.

I stole this from the blog of Scott Adams the Dilbert guy. This imagery made me laugh out loud.
"Today I am whacked out on pain killers because yesterday I had surgery to correct my deviated septum. I didn’t ask a lot of questions about the procedure but I can deduce most of the details based on the way I feel today. Apparently doctors shove a starving wolverine into one nostril, where it scratches and eats until it hits brain. Then they pull him out by his tail. Nurses stop the bleeding by packing each nostril with a queen size mattress that is carefully wrapped around a wino."


Not much else to report.

But I was held hostage by my garage door today. It got off kilter in the tracks somehow. And it did, like a rat looking for a cheeto in a maze, take me a few minutes to get out. It was really cold, and it was morning. You know I rarely have anything brilliant going on upstairs before noon anyway, and couple that with my poor circulation and lower than normal body temperature..It must have been how cavemen felt. So after tapping the door three times with my car, it sprung open and a genie popped out.

Several times I almost thought it was going to be a real issue, like "I have to call into work, I"m going to be stuck in my garage forever." until the inner voice of calm that is Murl says "This is a garage. You are not trapped without food or water in an elevator or something even relatively small. And the side door still works. The people-sized one."

I could explain my attempts at getting out of this contraption, but it would be snoozerific. So I will spare you. Lets just say I learned a lot about my garage door. And about how you can't prop it up with a garden rake. And how I'm glad there weren't small dogs or children around when I tried to prop it up with a garden rake.

Funniest part may be when I eventually did get out of the garage, out of habit I hit the button and it closed. I backed out of the driveway and by the time i reached the street (read BIG time delay) I finally noticed that it had worked.

I was cold.


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